The older I get, the faster the years go…so it makes sense that 2022 flew by in a blink. In comparison with previous years, this was a really, really good one, though it was not without its challenges. My word for the year was PERSEVERE, which I chose with the intention to “just keep going” no matter what curveballs came my way. As has been my practice for the past several years, I didn’t set any big, lofty goals; rather, I wanted to focus on living my word without any extra stress (because my regular daily life brings more than enough of that!).
For the last few years, I’ve viewed Facebook as a necessary evil. It’s an easy way to update my friends and family and vice versa. I belong to a number of personal and professional groups, including a fitness accountability group that I post in daily. I have pages for my business, and rely on other pages for info about my kids’ extracurricular activities.
But over the last few months, scrolling my Facebook feed has become an increasingly negative experience. I’m not even talking about political posts and arguments in the comment sections. What I mean is that consuming bit and pieces of other peoples’ lives has led me to question my own career, social life, accomplishments…everything. I found myself constantly living in comparison mode, and the worse it got, the more addicted to scrolling I became.
Back in August, my friend told me that she was going back to school for her PhD in speech-language pathology. I have a lot in common with this friend: we both have two kids (our boys play competitive travel soccer together), busy careers, and full social lives.
So when she shared this news with me, the first words out of my mouth were, “Oh wow, I could never do that.”
I’ve been saying that for years. I went straight to graduate school after finishing undergrad, so the only life I knew was student life. That served me well, and helped me stay focused as I earned my master’s degree in music therapy. My mom went back to school for her doctorate shortly after turning 50, and I was just in awe of her ability to do so. I couldn’t imagine the rigorous schedule and responsibilities of being a student ON TOP OF regular life.
After that conversation with my friend, though, I rethought my words. Why couldn’t I do it? School was my thing; the only B I ever got — like, literally ever — was in a dance class my freshman year of college, and I’m still not over it. (Kidding, kind of.) I love to learn, and I had been feeling the itch for professional growth over the last year or so.
A few days later, I found myself googling “counseling programs” and taking copious notes. Wait, what? Did I want to become a counselor? Apparently, yes I did.
Okay, so I have a confession to make: the pandemic has turned me into a bit of an online shopaholic. Luckily for my bank account, my purchases are usually under $35 (save for the occasional splurges), and all directly benefit my well-being in one way or another.
For example, I’m spending pretty much ALL of my time at home right now, and that has empowered me to make my home as comfortable, beautiful, and optimized as possible. A good majority of my shopping has been focused on that goal.
Another significant portion of my purchases have been dedicated to my physical health. In the new year, I’ve recommitted myself to working out regularly at home, so I’ve been slowly building up my collection of fitness equipment.
The last area in which I’ve been investing is self-care, though you could argue that all of these fall under that category. My current favorite things — the ones I’m sharing with you here today, all relate directly to self-care. I’ll explain below just how each item has affected my physical, emotional, and/or mental health.
Last year on this very day, I wrote that I had “mixed emotions about leaving 2019 behind”. Well, I can tell you for certain that my emotions are NOT mixed in the slightest about 2020 ending. It’s been a hard year for everyone, and I know we are all more than ready for 2021.
My word for 2020 was OPTIMIZE. I had high hopes for streamlining all areas of my life, but little did I know when I chose this word that life would be anything but optimal in the months to come.
Self-care is a common topic among the music therapy community. We talk about it a lot, but do we actually implement it in our daily lives? It’s something I personally struggle with. I know what I want to do for self-care, but finding the time to actually take care of myself is difficult. Who else is in this same boat?
We’re all busy. Maybe you’re working a full-time job, you have kids stuck at home doing remote learning, you’re trying to navigate a pandemic, you’re enduring the stresses of everyday life, the list could go on and on. For me, it’s trying to plan a wedding during COVID-19. I find myself using this and so many other excuses as reasons to put off self-care.
Instead of using our busy lives as an excuse why we can’t give ourselves some self-love, let’s start using them as reasons why we need to care for ourselves.
Easier said than done, am I right?